Fall has officially arrived to Raleigh, NC (yay!), and there are sooo many great pumpkin patches to choose from in the Triangle area. Do you have a favorite one? If so, I would love for you to comment in the space below so we could all check it out. I know it’s not exactly couples counseling related, but it’s an important decision nevertheless:) My husband is big on visiting farms during the October month and we are planning on checking out Hill Ridge Farm in Youngsville, Vollmer Farm, and Philips Farm in Cary in the next couple of weeks.

Okay, let’s get back on track.This week we are talking about easy ways you could show love and appreciation to your most important person. When you show love and gratitude to your marriage mate on a daily basis, the benefits are numerous. It is extremely vital that you build a marriage that is healthy and feels great to both of you, otherwise what’s the point anyway? There are probably a million ways in which marriage partners can show love and appreciation to each other. In this article, I will be showing you 10 great ways for you to express your appreciation to your spouse in a loving manner.

1.     Be vocal and do it more frequently

Deliberately saying a simple thank you more frequently to your partner is one of the best ways to show them that you are grateful. Sometimes, you could begin to ignore giving thanks to your partner for the tasks that they perform every day because they seem a bit mundane to you. However, when you show gratitude to them for these things, your partner will begin to change their perception of these tasks. Saying thank you doesn’t really require much from you but those words mean a lot to others. It’s all about small things, remember?

2.     Use simple things like cards and notes

Write down a beautiful note telling your spouse how grateful you are and then put the note where they’ll discover it easily. You can put it in the car, stick it on the refrigerator, place it in their bag, or any cool place. You can also scribble something on a sticky note. This will make them feel really appreciated and motivated.

3.     Give your partner some alone time

Your partner might secretly be craving some alone time, especially, if they have been working too hard or have been weighed down with taking care of the kids. It is possible that all they want could also be a little time off from regular house chores. It would be thoughtful of you to provide them with the opportunity to really have all the alone time that they need to chill and let out all the stress. Their alone time could come in the form of them reading a book, you helping them do the chores, or even helping to take care of the kids at home for the day.

4.     Treat them to a special meal

If your spouse has a special meal that they are head over heels for or has a recipe which has been on their mind, you can take it upon yourself to cook them that special meal and treat them to a nice service. All you have to do is to plan your time to do this. You can accompany the meal with some music, light up candles, and add a touch of romance to the setting. This will surely make them feel special.

5.     Show gratitude by speaking highly of your spouse to your children

Showing gratitude to your spouse in front of your kids will definitely get your kids to do the same with time. Take some time to really tell your children how great your spouse is and about all the good things that they do to keep the family going. You can also encourage them to be appreciative too by saying thank you. One other thing that you can do is to teach your kids creative ways of showing gratitude to dad or mom by creating artworks that reflect their appreciativeness. You can also teach them to help out in carrying out simple tasks in the home in other to reduce the workload for your spouse. When you teach your kids to be grateful, it will help to build a healthy marriage life.

6.     Speak volumes about your spouse in public

Tell other people, when you can, how big a blessing your spouse is to you and how thankful you are that you have them in your life. Verbalize it when you are out with friends visiting one of the great restaurants in Wake Forest or Raleigh or visiting family. You can also do it on social media. Post your spouse from time to time telling the world how grateful you are to have them.

7.     Your behavior is important

It is not enough to just say thank you, offer them gifts, and verbalize your gratitude to others. Your behavior must constantly reflect that you are grateful. Never take your spouse for granted. Observe the effort that they put in to make you happy and sincerely respect it. Constantly evaluate your actions and thoughts to be sure that their efforts are not being undermined by you.

8.     Romantic dates are great

One of the most special ways to show how grateful you are to your spouse is to arrange a surprise but nice romantic date for you both. It could be at their choice restaurant in Wake Forest, Raleigh, or someplace else, you could get tickets to see a movie that they have always wanted to see, you could go hiking with them, or visit a bookstore with them. But remember, the focus should be on them.

9.     Get them a gift

Gifts can also do the trick. Sometimes your spouse may desire a particular thing but may not really be moved to get it for themselves. You could surprise them by purchasing it for them and then adding a note of appreciation which shows how much you are thankful for having them in your life. It could be a necktie, a book, a dress, and so on.

10.  Give more, take less

Do not be only a taker. Try to give even more than you take from your spouse. Ensure that you reciprocate their good deeds in even better ways and that you do so in a selfless manner. When you give to your spouse, never expect them to pay you back.

I hope this information helps you understand more about how to recreate the exciting feeling that comes with a love affair between your partner and yourself in Raleigh. If you have any questions, do not hesitate to call at (703)-347- 3200 for your free of charge 15 min consultation and or to schedule an appointment in my Wake Forest office or online.

If you are looking for help with your relationships or marriage, you can read more about how I can help here. One of the biggest regrets that my couples share with me is that they wish they could have started couples counseling several years sooner. You do NOT have to be one of those couples. You deserve to feel loved and confident about your relationship TODAY. So pick up the phone and give a call,  so I can teach you how to live in the day to day in a way that leaves you feeling connected and energized about being together and feeling like a REAL couple. 


Irina Baechle,LCSW is a founder, owner, and a licensed therapist at IrinaBaechleCounselingLLC. She specializes in helping distant couples and anxious singles build truly connected and meaningful relationships. She currently offers online and in-home counseling services to residents of Virginia and North Carolina (and most countries abroad). Click here to schedule your free 15 min consultation. Follow her on Facebook, Pinterest, and Youtube for useful tips and resources.

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